so the second week of the new format comes along, and yes... its still as horrible as before. let's hope the BBC pulls its head out of its ass and realizes that this is NOT the way to fix things.
40. "hounds of love" - the futureheads (last week's position: 19)
39. "typical me" - kano (22)
38. "everywhere" - LNM project f. bonnie bailey (new entry)
well, this week starts off promising – in that they are actually playing the first new entry in its entirety, unfortunately its another crap dance remake. but this time we go back to the 1970s and Fleetwood Mac for inspiration, rather than the 80s. has that decade been pillaged enough already? anyway, this is very horrible – using every trick in the book, from echo vocal tricks to the compressed beat as i like to call it. if we only get to hear select new entries in whole, why does it have to be one this crap? this does make me want to go pull out my Fleetwood Mac vinyl and hear pop done right.
37. "heartbeatz" - styles & breeze f. karen danzig (16)
36. "need to feel loved" - reflekt f. delline bass (21)
35. "sometimes you can't make it on your own" - u2 (27)
34. "soldier" - destiny's child f. t.i. & lil wayne (23)
33. "out of touch" - uniting nations (24)
32. "on a noose" - tower of london (new entry)
promising garage rock here, but how would us listeners be able to tell, since the moron twins hosting the show decide to babble on randomly about the band over a short clip. they manage to include such wonderful witticisms as, “i’ve never met them, but it sounds like they smell”. of course, that’s exactly what i’d rather hear than, you know, say the ACTUAL FUCKING MUSIC! sorry, i’ll try to keep that all in check this week.
31. "let's get blown" - snoop dogg f. pharrell williams (20)
30. "numb/encore" - jay-z/linkin park (25)
29. "turn da lights off" - tweet f. missy elliott (new entry)
and we actually get this whole song as well, which is fantastic, because this song is really hot. it kicks off with a great intro speech by Missy, interspersed with an old vocal soul sample. the main beat sample source sounds like it’s coming straight off of old vinyl and into your ear, just a simple repeated horn figure from some old jazz album. Tweet comes in to carry us over the beat, I’ve always been a big fan of her voice – and a hot beat like this makes me love it even more. my only complaint is that the Missy intro goes on a little long, maybe if she actually kicked a few rhymes instead of just spouting random lines it would be a little better. however, the line “this is not a mixtape, this is a sick tape” is absolutely classic. very solid single, this deserves to go far this year.
28. "lift me up" - moby (18)
27. "almost here" - brian mcfadden & delta goodrem (15)
26. "rock-a-hula baby" - elvis presley (3)
25. "shot down" - nine black alps (new entry)
apparently the BBC is NOT all about the rock, as this promising sounding track gets the shaft, with just a ten second snippet.
24. "like toy soldiers" - eminem (17)
23. "free my name" - ocean colour scene (new entry)
and OCS also gets the shaft, barely even ten seconds this time around. i’m really going to have to hunt this track down, as i used to be a huge fan of the band but fell off once their albums stopped being available in the
22. "hype hype" - SLK (new entry)
this is a pretty cool grime track here, all crazy and ragged. the title is perfect, as this is hyper as all hell – complete with a schizophrenic beat and a couple emcee’s spitting craziness all over the place. the drums are on some wild African polyrhythmic sort of thing, balanced by a sweet bassline and horn samples. the female emcee only makes a short appearance, but she sounds pretty cool – i’ll have to listen for this again to see if i can catch her name.
21. "don't play nice" - verbalicious (13)
20. "caught up" - usher (14)
19. "i'm not okay (i promise)" - my chemical romance (new entry)
i really love this song, its only grown more and more on me since i first heard it months ago. this is emo/punk done wonderfully, just the right balance of melody and aggression. i like how the song stays in check without the screaming getting out of hand – they seem to remember that this is a pop song, something more (scr)e(a)mo bands could take a lesson from. the two best moments are that blistering guitar solo and the moment when the screamed second syllable of “okay” comes in after the quiet bit. seriously, this is an excellent song.
18. "oh my god" - kaiser chiefs (11)
17. "how we do" - the game f. 50 cent (12)
16. "foolish" - tyler james (new entry)
i’m not sure exactly what i would classify this song as, but i rather like it. reminds me a little of Robbie Williams, in that its just a general sort of pop tune that doesn’t belong to any particular genre. it’s definitely R&B influenced, but shuffles along like a rock-oriented pop tune. towards the end the guy begins to over sing and the ad libbed scat thing over the piano grates on my nerves, but before we get to that point we are treated with a decent little upbeat pop tune.
15. "an honest mistake" - the bravery (7)
14. "wake me up" - girls aloud (10)
13. "you're my first, my last, my everything" - howard brown (new entry)
the song hasn’t even started yet and I’m already worried, as they reveal that this is a charity single by some dude that sings adverts for
12. "hush" - ll cool j (9)
11. "do somethin" - britney spears (6)
10. "locked up" - akon (8)
9. "california" - phantom planet (new entry)
not sure exactly why this song from 2002 is just now getting a single release here in 2005, but i’m guessing it has something to do with The O.C. starting to get a heavy UK push or something of that sort. as for the song itself, it’s not a bad slice of rock here, although its hard for me to be objective as i’ve heard this song numerous times over the past three years – and to be honest, i could die happy not having heard it ever again. it’s a good summertime road trip anthem though, all epic chorus and driving beat. not a bad song, but puzzling to hear in the Top 10 nearly 3 years after its original release.
8. "krafty" - new order (new entry)
this is excellent, one of my favorite New Order singles since the 1980s’ classics like “Blue Monday” or “Bizarre Love Triangle”. “Krafty” is a wonderfully bouncy pop tune, striking a great balance between the synth-driven traditional New Order sound and the more rock-oriented sound they’ve explored more recently. lyrically, this is a really uplifting song about how wonderful life is and appreciating just where you are in life. and the great thing is, it’s not cheesy in the least. ok, well sorta, but it really is an uplifting song that makes you want to smile and bounce along whilst driving at a fast speed down the highway, windows down and breeze blowing in. this just could be my Spring 2005 anthem, leaving me drooling in anticipation of the new album.
7. "get right" - jennifer lopez (5)
6. "star to fall" - cabin crew (4)
5. "over and over" - nelly & tim mcgraw (2)
4. "dakota" - stereophonics (1)
3. "falling stars" - sunset strippers (new entry)
ugh, so remember last week when I wrote about that Cabin Crew single (number 6 this chart)? yeah? well go back and read it again, because it will pretty much sum up this single as well. that’s right, this is another dance mix based on the Boy Meets Girl sample from the 1980s. i’m not sure why we needed two singles based on the same song two weeks in a row, but as the BBC doesn't consult me on matters such as this, here they are. let’s just hope numbers 2 and 1 hold something more exciting in store for us.
2. "good luck charm" - elvis presley (new entry)
another Elvis single fails to break number one, this one would have been a great one to pull such a feat though. i like this much more than the last several, a decent semi-ballad sent out to his love and how she's better than a nasty ol' rabbit's foot any day. the backing harmonies really make this song, especially the guy with the bass voice popping in with his “uh-huh” now and then. it’s not the best Elvis single i’ve ever heard, but it doesn’t make me want to attach a vacuum to my outer ear and suck out my brain - so it does have that going for it at least.
1. "all about you" - mcfly (new entry)
and this is a double a-side single released for charity, somehow involved with Comic Relief 2005. the funniest thing about it is that they actually got enough people to buy this crappy song to make it to number one. it’s a horrible ballad in which the boys from McFly trade off verses, both of them managing to sound like they’re struggling with a bowel movement. i suppose this is what passes for “emotion” to the kids of
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