via//chicago

"I like Kid Rock..."

There, I've said it. I do. I like Kid Rock, always have. Well, since 1998 anyway. I wouldn't call myself a rabid fan, but I have followed all his albums since the multi-platinum breakthrough and I've even seen him in concert. He was good, very entertaining in an old school, big, loud, and dumb RAWK show kind of way. It wasn't the early singles off Devil Without A Cause that hooked me, nah... I really wasn't feeling "I Am the Bullgod" or "Bawitdaba". But holy trailer park savior, did "Only God Knows Why" hit me in the right kind of way. Sappy drama, pseudo sweeping grandeur, and over sentimentality combined in the right kind of way to sock me right in the gut. I could never really explain why I liked it so much, still really can't, but it's a great fucking song. That little break towards the end, where his voice switches from smooth balladeer to impassioned victim as he belts out "you get what you put in / and people get what they deserve", that's a great moment in pop history right there. That was enough to get me to buy the album, and I really dug his attitude of, "fuck you, this is the music I love, and I'll do exactly what I want". He gained momentum thanks to the rise of rap-rock, but it was his talents as a genuinely great songwriter that helped him sell 12 million copies of that record.

The follow-up, 2001's Cocky, wasn't nearly as successful ("only" 5 mil this time around) but I think its the much better album. Rock let his love of Southern Rock shine through, veering from Skynyrd namechecks and samples to back-porch ballads that worked surprisingly well. I loved the new turn he was making, my favorite songs ended up being the sappy "Lonely Road of Faith" and "Midnight Train to Memphis", not to mention the hugely successful duet with Sheryl Crow, "Picture". It was a fun, shameless album. Unfortunately it was also marked the point where Rock started to lose the plot.

Thanks to "Picture", he'd been co-opted by mainstream country, going so far as to re-record that song with the slightly more country Allison Moorer. From that point on he was all over VH1 and CMT, rocking out with a wide variety of country superstars and classic rockers. It got to the point where he was the default "edgy" guy for slightly past their prime rockers to drag out when they needed to get back in touch with the "kids". His next album, 2003's self-titled effort, found him milking his new reputation for all it was worth - alternating between the country courtin' ballads and the southern rockers. He even tapped Hank Williams Jr. and Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top for guest spots. There were a few decent songs ("Jackson, Mississippi" and "Son of Detroit" come immediately to mind) but it was fairly obvious that Kid wasn't doing these songs because he loved them - he was just trying to keep his new audience. I mean, how much more blatant can you get than doing another sappy duet with Sheryl Crow? It had a few moments, but overall I thought it was a minor disappointment.

Which brings us to his latest release, the horrifically titled Rock N Roll Jesus. And I think its safe to say that not only has he completely lost direction, he can't even find the room that contains the fucking map. As much as I didn't want it to, this album completely sucks. Kid isn't even trying anymore, he's just reheating stale leftovers. "So Hott" is a misguided attempt at resurrecting his hard rockin' rap lovin' persona, but it feels completely phoned in. Meanwhile he tries to recapture the glory of "Only God Knows Why" and "Lonely Road of Faith" with the Bob Seger inspired "Roll On", except that he forgot the part about writing a good song. The lyrics are just horrible and naming songs like he's Prince all of the sudden ("When U Love Someone", "Don't Tell Me U Love Me") just makes it all sound even more stupid. It says something when the most enjoyable song on the whole disc is a bonus track live recoding of a cut from the last album ("Jackson, Mississippi"). Beyond that, I'd keep maybe two songs. Probably the sweet in spite of itself "All Summer Long" and the David Allan Coe assisted redneck rocker "Half Your Age", that's about it.

I didn't want to write a scathing review of his new album, I really wanted to be able to talk about how he put out another surprisingly strong one. I just can't though, this thing is awful. Just so awful, apparently, that the American people bought enough copies to make it Rock's first ever number one album. I guess that shows what I know.