via//chicago

marked like a wanted slab of beef, he slowly walked through the darkened hallway as if in a trance. his head hung slightly to the left, mouth agape. his dead, red eyes were fixed on the halo of green light surrounding the door fifty feet in front of him. a slow, low hum crept into his ears, keeping the time with his exhausted soul. his feet seemed to carry him forward with little regard to what the rest of his body was intent on doing. if he cared to explore it, he might have found the feeling a little exhilarating. but his mind was a blank canvas on which no one cared to paint anymore. including himself. deadened to the world, just the way he liked it. the way he trained it to become. no feeling, no pain, no anguish, no love. never caring for anything, never connecting with anything. that's why he normally would have found this journey towards the green light off-putting, since he never allowed himself to be distracted by feelings like curiosity. but his dead mind had been allowed to wallow undisturbed for so long now, that it had begun to make other plans. but all this was unknown to him as slowly continued towards the door. at the appropriate moment, his brain sent out the message to his muscles, causing his hand to reach out for the doorknob. sweat broke out on his brow as it touched the warm metal. this might have surprised him, but not this night. his hand twitched as his muscles forced up a rebellion against the brain, as they knew what was to come. but as per usual the brain quelled the revolution and forced the hand to turn the knob. instead of the door opening as one might have expected, it instead rippled and burst into shattering wood that went flying into his face and down the hallway. the sound would have deafened him if he had ever been inclined to listen to anything. suddenly his eyes regained their focus, watching the spinning projectile head towards his forehead in ever decreasing stop-motion. he realized what it was and suddenly his soul snapped to life and tried to overthrow the numbed brain. it was an intense struggle, but for once the brain was defeated. the soul screamed out in victory and redemption, but all the worn-out mouth could extract as the bullet tore through his forehead was a faint... "i want to feel"